Many of my days in 2011 went something like this:
6:00 Alarm (on phone) goes off. Check weather (on phone), CHECK email and Facebook (on phone). Read some NPR news (on phone). Get out of bed.
6:30 Live. Open blinds, “Let’s let the day in!”
7:00 Flip through Newspaper – death, war, fires, car bombs, sex abuse, ….. Turn on radio – European economy, Syrian rebels, Kim Jong-il, Kim Jong-un, Occupy this and that….
Live
7:50 “Have a good day. I love you.”
8:00 In car. CHECK email on phone. Delete, Delete, Delete. Turn car radio on. The BBC – The world is ending. I get it.
8:15 At office/studio. Turn on computer. I must quickly CHECK on large screen in case anything in the world has drastically changed in the last fifteen minutes or looks significantly worse on a 13 x 11in. screen as opposed to a 3 x 2 one.
Live, write, live, write. Here a CHECK, there a CHECK, everywhere a CHECK CHECK (email and Facebook that is).
1:00 In car. "Diane Rehm Show" on NPR. The first hour - depressing news. The second hour - about a best selling novel or what I like to call fictional bad news inspired by actual bad news.
1:15 At the gym. I see a friendly face. “Would love to talk, but as you can see my ears are filled with these little white things that are impossible to dislodge. They’re transmitting a critically important podcast about Andy Warhol – one that will have completely fallen out of my brain before days end.” On a machine that makes my legs go up and down in the most unnatural way while looking at videos of strangers that will never be part of my life. No, I'm not watching porn, I'm watching my favorite stand-up comedians on YouTube while staying oblivious to the possibly hilarious people on nearby machines. CHECK. New emails are not loading. Must be bad reception in this building. &&$#%^$! Could be important. Must check. Workout faster, faster – actually getting a pretty good workout. Done. Leaving building. Whew! Can now CHECK. Delete email from Goodyear.
2:15 Back in car. NPR - “The Q with Jian Ghomeshi.” An almost interesting interview with a Canadian band I’ve never heard of. Good news - I’ve made a new discovery which is that I can’t stand a particular band whose name I can’t remember.”
2:30 Parked outside my daughter’s school. Must CHECK.
Live
CHECK
Live some more.
6:00 Make dinner while listening to "Money Market"on NPR. Cut potatoes and calculate the date on which all of the countries on the planet will have collapsed financially and otherwise.
Live
8:00 Ah,…. time to relax, CHECK, but now, LIKE, LIKE, LIKE (on Facebook)
Live
10:00 In bed. Set alarm (on phone). CHECK.
Goodnight moon
Goodnight loves, goodnight thoughts
Goodnight stars, goodnight air
Goodnight information everywhere
***
The physician/psychiatrist in me is tempted to launch into definitions of addiction and explain how my neurotransmitters, specifically dopamine, are being tweaked by my behaviors in such a way that make me desire and seek out more stimulation - in this case information stimulation - which leads me to check my phone or turn on the radio, thereby continuing to reinforce the cycle.
The human being in me, however, would simply say that the amount of time I spend distracted, detached and disturbed is the amount of time I’m not focused, content and connected to myself, my family or the world.
So though I’m not usually into resolutions and would rather make changes slowly, for me, this situation, at this time in my life, requires a “cold turkey” approach. In the year of 2012 there are things I want more than too much information.
My 2012 resolutions:
- Honestly assess the importance of information.
- Unsubscribe to emails that are not from a person. There are no deals or discounts worth my sanity. If I want to know about an upcoming events for an organization, I’ll look it up.
- Keep email box as empty as possible. Change email account to one with less spam.
- Check email no more than twice a day. (Some work requires more; mine does not).
- Have silence, music or conversation even if with myself in the car.
- Put phone away. I try not to live in fear, but sometimes raising anxiety can be helpful which is why I just reviewed some information on cell phones and radiation.
- Stop using phone as a clock. It's these little "conveniences" that keep me checking.
- Avoid checking weather on phone. If it's winter, I’ll assume it’s cold. If I’m not absolutely confident about this, I’ll step outside. As for chances of rain, I’ll just have to live on the edge.
- Check email only on my main computer unless absolutely necessary, such as if I’m expecting a message from my book agent - the one I don’t have - about my book - the one I haven’t written (yet).
- No headphones during exercise – just think, feel (even if only muscular pain) and say hello, chat or perhaps make a new friend.
- Take only picture worthy pictures with phone. Remember the good ones are drowning in the rubbish.
- Delete the Facebook icon on my phone. Done. Wow! That felt great. Check Facebook no more than once a day on main computer.
- Consider replacing my smart phone with a ridiculously stupid phone - one that might even make me smarter.